Teachers: Here Are The Answers To Your
Questions About Students Who Struggle And Have Challenges
by Ruth Wells
80% of teacher training tends to be on content, with only about
20% of training focusing on the "human factors," those
minute-to-minute problems with your youngsters that dominate
each day. Whether you are a teacher, counselor, social worker
or psychologist, there are days that you run out of answers.
Here is your chance to get the answers you need for your most
challenging youth problems. Eavesdrop on the questions posed in
our Live Expert Help area of our web site, and perhaps your
question will be answered. Have a question for Live Help?
Click on the Live Help icon at our site,
http://www.youthchg.com.
Q: Do you have any ideas how to get young children to show up
at our site when no parent seems willing to assist the child to
attend?
A: We believe in the ends justify the means in this area,
meaning that unless it violates your site's rules or policies,
then do it if it will help the child to attend. Your service is
just that important, that you should do whatever it takes to get
the child in. Actions can include waking the child by phone,
picking up the child in the morning, or securing an alarm clock
for the youngster to use. You can also use our popular
"Countdown to School (or Agency) Schedule" or make a facsimile
of it. The "Countdown to School Schedule" lists times for the
child to perform the actions needed to get ready for school. It
compensates a bit for the lack of vital family supervision.
BONUS INTERVENTION:
If you work with young children, you know that many can't tell
time and may not reliably know numbers, so put a piece of tape
under the place where the numbers will click in on a digital
clock. On the tape, write the time you want the child to get
up. So, you might put a "7" on the tape, and teach the child to
get up and go when the number on the clock matches the number on
the tape. It is sad to have you taking over the family's job,
but if you have been unable to engage the family, this may be
an option worth considering.
BONUS INTERVENTION:
For very young children, just teach them to "get up and go,"
and wait a bit before adding in other less crucial tasks like
washing the face, for example. Once the child masters the
basics, you can add on more tasks. In the meantime, you may
want to have a few snacks, some sweatshirts, etc. to fill in
the gaps. Whether an older youth, a younger child, a cold or
hungry kid will have difficulty benefitting from your service.
Be sure to also expose the child to plenty of
motivation-makers; there are a few on our site, and hundreds in
our books http://www.youthchg.com/school.html. A child who
believes that your service is incredibly important, may work
harder to arrive.
Q: I am so frustrated trying to get some parents to do their
job! What ideas do you have to get parents to do what they are
supposed to do?
A: By the time you run into a troubled family, the problems
have been in that system for a long time. We actually do not
recommend that people who are not family therapists continue to
spend large amounts of time working to engage parents who never
seem to improve. If you are a teacher with 30 in your
classroom, or a school counselor with a caseload of 500, for
example, it is not realistic that in your brief seconds of
"spare time," you somehow magically turnaround deeply troubled
families. In your spare time, you probably will not be able to
get that mom to finally stop drinking, or that dad to suddenly
recognize the importance of your service. Instead, we recommend
that you discontinue or reduce your repeatedly unsuccessful
efforts with the adults, and devote all or most of your energy
to helping the child succeed without family support. The ideas
shown above, on helping even young children attend your site
without family aid, are an example of what we mean. Yes, this
is tragic, but you can still succeed with the child even though
you may never succeed with the parents. The child is your real
target, and where the best hope for success may lie.
Q: We are seeing more and more kids who are incredibly mean and
violent, and it seems like absolutely nothing I do makes them
behave. What can I do that would work better?
A: This is one of the most frequent questions we get. 11-15% of
your population are conduct disorders. That is a mental health
term that a mental health professional can apply to some
extremely hurtful kids. The way you work with conduct
disorders, and kids you believe might be conduct disorders,
differs dramatically from conventional approaches. Conventional
approaches will consistently fail with this portion of your
kids. You have to use a different set of tools, or else you
will continue to feel that virtually nothing you do yields any
useful results. We have a good resource for you on this. Go to
our site, http://www.youthchg.com/hottopic.html, where some of
the basics on conduct disorders are spelled out. If you need
it, our "All the Best Answers for the Worst Problems: Conduct
Disorders and Anti-Social Youth" books can give you more than
the introductory information in the article.
Q: Can you explain to me what Aspergers is? And, what should I
do?
A: Aspergers is a constellation of symptoms that varies from
child to child. It may be related to autism, and is not fully
understood. Only a counselor or medical professional can
diagnose it. Some common symptoms are inappropriate social
behaviors, distractibility, developmental delays, and
repetitive talk or actions. It's more common in males. Unlike
autistic children, language and cognitive functioning may not
be as significantly delayed or impaired. Also, this disorder
may be identified later, or occur later than autism. It is
often misdiagnosed. We suggest that you not let the terminology
confuse you-- even though many professionals are understandably
confused by this diagnostic term. Instead, focus on the
specific problems you see in the individual child, then
prioritize the concerns and work on them systematically. We
suggest you focus on three areas at a time.
BONUS INTERVENTION:
If you have developed good methods to work with ADD-affected
children, some of those methods will work well with Aspergers-
affected youth. For example: for problematic verbal
interactions, you can teach your ADD- or Aspergers-affected
child how to make Opening, Middle and Closing Lines, as a way
to give them essential everyday conversational skills. Opening
Lines initiate the conversation, Middle Lines continue it, and
Closing Lines terminate it.
WANT MORE ANSWERS TO YOUR WORST "KID PROBLEMS?"
That's what we are here for. Consider coming to a live
Breakthrough Strategies class
(http://www.youthchg.com/live.html), or order the course on
DVD/video (http://www.youthchg.com/tape.html). We're here to
help youth professionals help troubled youth.
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Ruth Wells MS is the director of Youth
Change; click here. http://www.youthchg.com Get free samples
and see 100s more of her problem-stopping interventions at
Youth Change's web site. Ruth is the author of dozens of books
and ebooks, and conducts professional development workshops
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